Sunday, 12 August 2012

Bloody Food!

Age is killing me. My body is rebelling. I am not happy.

I decided in January that I really need to be healthier and this is working albeit slowly. Ive lost three stone, go for walks around the New Forest and I'm gearing myself - gasp! horrors! - to start running, having downloaded some very helpful podcasts from the NHS. ("Couch to 5k" if you are interested).

This is all very well, but my body has, for the last few years, thrown me some googlies.

I've always had an intolerance to Dairy, but mostly ignored it as I simply cannot live without cheese. Although my intake has plummeted in 2012 because of the weight loss thing, it hasn't been cut out altogether, but I do actually feel better simply for not eating it all day, everyday.
So when in 2000, my body decided alcohol was evil and had no place in my body, I knew the signs, knew it was an intolerance got it checked by the doctor and have barely had a drink since.
On the rare occasions I do go out and get shit-faced, I have to ensure two clear days after so that the rashes and swelling go down before I get on with life.

Then, probably about 7-8 years ago, my second love after cheese started giving me the same symptoms along with the feeling that my stomach was trying to escape from three polar bears that were ripping it apart. Mushrooms, my beautiful beautiful fungus friends, now cause me immense pain. Learning to live without has be incredibly difficult although sometime I just think "fuck it" and endure the pain for the joy of mushrooms. Quorn, incidentally, is made up of the very protein I'm intolerant to. I once had some Quorn and screamed solidly for two days. Quorn is evil. Yes it is.

So, being a heavy drinking, cheese loving mushroom fiend, my life of foodie treats seems pretty much to end. Well, at least I have bread, right?


Since last summer, every time I"ve eaten bread, pasta, biscuits, etc., my stomach has swollen and done the polar bear thing and I've pooped like wee. I now have a wheat intolerance.

I can eat a bit of bread, but anything more than about half a slice of white and I"m writhing on the floor in agony. I find myself walking round Sainsbury's 'Free-From' section and sighing a lot.

Still the wheat, dairy and gluten free vegan Chocolate and Ginger Slice was lovely. So thats something. My doctors says it common for people of my age to start rejecting foods, so I shouldn't worry, but hell. All my favourite things gone? I truly believe I died many years ago and instead of going to hell I was sent to Southampton to have food intolerances.

Wednesday, 1 August 2012

Now That's What I call Whatsiwhositnow?

I find it very interesting that the "Now Thats What I Call Reggae" album is being advertised on TV by a number of reggae artists doing non-reggae songs.  THe only vaguely reggae sounding song on the advert is "Red Red Wine" by UBfucking40.

What's wrong with this picture?